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I read this poem on Nate and Jess’ blog today {they’re two of my amazing new role models. Simply adore them!}, and honestly, it couldn’t have been more perfect. I struggle oh-so-terribly with wanting to know how my life will turn out, and having everything figured out, and just trusting that God will provide. Lately, I’ve especially been afraid that I will be alone in ministry one day… {I sometimes tell my friends about the perfect husband – a worship leader who loves kids and has a heart for inner city ministry. A godly leader who seeks after God with his whole heart. And yet…I wonder, as I have these “like” feelings for people, do I really seek after God with my whole heart? Do I live out the 1 Corinthians 13 attributes I want in a husband? *valentine’s day conviction*}

Lol, so yes. Enjoy the poem, let it soak in 🙂

Waiting by Linda Dillow

Desperately, helplessly, longingly I cried
Quietly, patiently, lovingly God replied.
I pled and I wept for a clue to my fate.
And the Master so gently said, “Child you must wait!”

“Wait? You say, wait!” my indignant reply.
“Lord, I need answers. I need to know why!
Is your hand shortened? Or have you not heart?
By faith I have asked, and am claiming your Word.”

“My future and all to which I can relate
Hangs in the balance and you tell me to wait?
I’m needing a yes, a go-ahead sign,
Or even a no to which I can resign.”

“And Lord, you promised that if we believe
We need but to ask, and we shall receive
And Lord, I’ve been asking, and this is my cry,
I’m weary of asking! I need a reply.”

Then quietly, softly, I learned of my fate
As my Master replied once again, “You must wait.”
So I slumped in my chair, defeated and taut
And grumbled to God, “So I’m waiting ….for what?”

He seemed then to kneel and His eyes wept with mine,
And he tenderly said, “I could give you a sign.
I could shake the heavens and darken the sun.
I could raise the dead and cause mountains to run.

All you seek, I could give and pleased you would be
You would have what you want,
but you wouldn’t know Me.

You’d not know the depth of my love for each saint.
You’d not know the power that I give to the faint.

You’d not learn to see through the clouds of despair.
You’d not learn to trust just by knowing I’m there.
You’d not know the joy of resting in me
When darkness and silence were all you could see.

You’d never experience that fullness of love
As the peace of my Spirit descends like a dove.
You’d know that I give and I save…(for a start).
But you’d not know the depth of the beat of my heart.

The glow of my comfort late into the night
The faith that I give when you walk without sight.
The depth that’s beyond getting just what you asked
Of an infinite God who makes what you have last.

You’d never know should your pain quickly flee,
What it means that ‘My grace is sufficient for thee.’
Yes, your dreams for your loved ones overnight would come true,
But, oh the loss! If I lost what I’m doing in you!

So be silent, my child and in time you will see
that the greatest of gifts is to get to know me
And though oft may my answers seem terribly late.
My wisest of answers is still but to wait.”

Dearest Jesus, they’re two promises I cling to. a) You will never, ever fail me or forsake me. b) You know the plans You have for me, they’re to prosper and not to harm give me a hope and a future. Jeremiah’s “hopeful future” kinda went sour, he died rejected by his own people. But imagine his joy at uniting with You! Your grace is enough. Always and forever.

Teach me to trust!

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